


Double Icarus Reacharound

by willowsandwonders



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, Meteorstuck, Retcon Timeline, and kanaya getting to vent for once in her life, just some girls awkwardly flirting on a rock in space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:14:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25299715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/willowsandwonders/pseuds/willowsandwonders
Summary: TT: I did just realize something though.GA: WhatTT: You totally have a type.GA: Yes We Have Just Exhaustively Examined All The Ways In Which The Two People I Have Experienced Flushed Feeling For Are SimilarTT: Light players.GA: God Dammit
Relationships: Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Comments: 6
Kudos: 39





	Double Icarus Reacharound

**Author's Note:**

> Drinking a milkshake and writing some Rosemary for the soul...sometimes good things come to writers who are ignoring all their other wips

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] started trolling tentacleTherapist [TT] \--

GA: I Have Been Thinking About Something

GA: Quite A Lot In Fact 

TT: Oh, do tell. 

GA: You Remind Me Of Her

GA: Which Makes Me Feel

GA: Well

GA: Like An Idiot I Suppose 

TT: Are we talking about Vriska here?

GA: Unfortunately 

TT: I’m sensing it’s a bad thing that I remind you of her.

GA: Wow 

GA: You Are Indeed A Seer

GA: That Came Out A Bit Harsh My Apologies

TT: I can handle harsh.

TT: I would prefer it, even, if the alternative is a half-truth said only to spare my feelings.

TT: If there’s a problem, I need to know about it.

TT: Otherwise how else am I supposed to fix it?

TT: We can’t just let things fester.

GA: There It Is Again

GA: Relationships Are Not Games To Win Or Lose

GA: You Cannot Identify Every Single Possible Problem To Immediately Weed Out

GA: This Does Not Guarantee A Successful Partnership

GA: If Anything The Expectation That Anyone Can Be Reduced To A Series Of Problems Caused By Their Personal Issues 

GA: That Can Then Simply Be Checked Off The List As Solved Forever

GA: Is Overly Optimistic At Best And Insulting At Worst

TT: I wanted to give you the opportunity to speak your mind, but if there’s one thing I cannot handle, it’s passive aggression.

TT: We can add that to my supposed list of “personal issues.”

GA: You Cannot Claim To Hate Passive Aggression When You So Regularly Engage In It Yourself

TT: Fair point.

TT: I really am trying my best to be civil here.

TT: You don’t usually initiate conversations like these. 

TT: This must be weighing on you heavily.

GA: Would You Prefer Active Aggression 

TT: Without a doubt.

GA: Vriska Treated Me Poorly And I Allowed Her To Do So Long Past The Point She Truly Cared About Me

GA: If She Ever Did At All

GA: And Yet Here I Am Again 

GA: If You Make The Same Choices That She Did

GA: I Know That I Will Not Stop You

GA: Which I Suppose Is More Of A Personal Failing Of Mine Than A Judgement Against You

TT: What did she do?

TT: I recognize that is a heavy question, but I’d like to know.

TT: If only, selfishly, so I can check myself for those behaviors and avoid them. 

TT: If you don’t want to get into it right this second, just say so and I’ll drop it.

TT: But this sounds like something we need to talk about sooner rather than later. 

GA: No I Have Already Fussed At You Enough

GA: You Deserve To Know What Ive Accused You Of Being Capable Of Doing

GA: Ugh

GA: I Am Already Butchering This

TT: I really don’t care whether what you have to say comes out elegantly or coherently at all.

TT: The not knowing is bothering me worse than any potential poor phrasings on your part. 

GA: Its The Little Things Like That Especially

GA: Where I Cant Help But Think Of Her Even If I Do Not Want To

GA: It Makes Sense Given Your Shared Aspect

GA: But She Could Never Stand It When I Alluded To Something That She Could Then Not Find An Answer To

TT: We are both quite preoccupied with knowing things, that’s true. 

TT: But as far as I’m aware I’ve never made too much of an ass out of myself trying to get information from you.

TT: I haven’t, right?

GA: Perhaps During The Game If Anything

GA: I Really Cannot Remember

GA: And Even Then It Was Less You Seeking Information From Me Than Me Trying To Figure Out The Aim Of Your Schemes

GA: It Was Never Too Terrible Of A Problem With Vriska Either Simply A Resemblance I See Often

TT: I’m sensing a “but” here. 

GA: As I Have Told You Vriska And I Were Once Moirails

GA: After This Long I Am Sure You Are Familiar With What That Entails

TT: I am, yes. 

TT: And in the case that I wasn’t, I’m sure that Karkat could give me some extra lessons.

GA: Ha

GA: He Did Quite Enjoy Meeting What May Have Been The Last People Alive In The Universe Who Had Never Heard Of Quadrants

GA: Perhaps This Innate Desire Shaped The Creation Of Your Original Universe Unconsciously

TT: Ha! 

TT: I’ll make sure to pass that theory along to Karkat the next time I see him.

TT: I’m sure that he’ll hate it.

TT: Though I think I’ve let us get a bit off track, here. 

TT: You were saying something about your moirallegiance with Vriska?

GA: Yes

GA: That

TT: I’m listening. 

GA: I Must Admit That I Was At Fault As Well In That Arrangement

GA: I Had Flushed Feelings For Her And I Was Not Honest About Them

GA: She Has Always Been Very Observant 

GA: I Am Sure That She Must Have Noticed Almost As Soon As I Did That I Was Hiding Something

GA: But She Never Said Anything About It Even Though I Am Sure At Times I Was Less Than Subtle 

GA: Red And Pale Vacillations Are Not Necessarily Unheard Of

GA: I Am Ashamed To Admit That I Entertained The Idea Often 

GA: Which Hindered My Ability To Be A Good Moirail

GA: As If I Ever Was One In The First Place

GA: A Moirallegiance Is Only Healthy If Both Sides Are Served Within It

GA: Ours Was Not A Traditional Highblood Lowblood Arrangement As We Were Both Skewed Closer To The Middle Of The Spectrum

GA: Rages Were Not Common For Her Nor Did She Particularly Want To Be Soothed By Me At All 

GA: Vulnerability Made Her Very Uncomfortable 

GA: In Fact She Deliberately Relied On Me As Little As Possible

GA: Any Time She Asked Me For Assistance It Was Usually Just To Complain More Than Anything Else 

GA: She Was Careful To Never Truly Need Me

GA: But To Maintain The Pretense Of A Good Moirallegiance She Would Almost Demand That I Open Up To Her Every Now And Then

GA: Or Perhaps She Really Did Care

GA: Open Affection Was Never Her Strong Suit And Even Well Meaning Gestures From Her Could Be A Bit

GA: Aggressive

TT: I’m not sure if this helps at all, but she seems to have mellowed out a bit as far as Terezi is concerned.

TT: Though my definition of “mellow” here would never work when applied to a regular person. 

GA: I Do Not Even Want To Get Into The Situation With Terezi And Vriska

GA: Though Perhaps That Discomfort Means That I Should 

TT: I am always prepared for a bit of gossip. 

GA: Are You Aware Of Their History Together 

TT: Yes, to an extent.

TT: Some pieces of the story they’ve told me themselves, others I’ve gleaned from their interactions with me and with each other. 

GA: Well For Starters I Am Quite Convinced That Vriska And I Would Have Never Been Moirails In The First Place If Terezi Had Remained In The Picture 

GA: It Is Quite Telling That Vriska Was Only Receptive To My Hesitant Advances After Her And Terezi Had Their Final Falling Out 

GA: Though I Was Largely Distracted By My Own Pitysick Feelings At The Time

GA: It Was Still Always Clear To Me That I Was At Best Her Second Choice

TT: Yikes.

GA: Yikes Indeed

TT: That was not my most artful of reassurances. 

GA: It Was Not

GA: But That Is Alright 

TT: I don’t think you want to hear me sit here and try to list all the reasons that I’m different than she is.

GA: You Would Be Correct

TT: But I can wholeheartedly assure you that you have never been my second choice.

TT: In fact, I feel lucky to be able to be in a relationship with you at all.

TT: It’s quite dizzying to think about how, in the absence of the Game, we would have grown up in separate universes entirely. 

GA: I Am Fortunate To Have Found You As Well

GA: Destiny Is A Funny Thing 

GA: I Can Not Claim That Everything It Has Given Me Was Good But Leading Me To You Earns It A Few Points In My Book

TT: :)

GA: :)

TT: That’s interesting.

GA: What Is

TT: I don’t think I’ve seen you use emoticons before.

GA: Perhaps I Am Branching Out

TT: I always support a bit of intercultural exchange.

TT: Except I suppose you all had emoticons on Alternia as well, so that’s not a fair comparison.

TT: It doesn’t look like you modify yours like the other trolls do, though.

GA: Well What Am I Supposed To Do

GA: I Am Not Sure How I Could Represent My Horns With English Letters

TT: Your teeth perhaps?

GA: :)=

GA: :f

GA: :E

GA: Fuck

TT: Pfft.

TT: I think the English language may have gotten you on this one, dear. 

GA: !

TT: I take it you enjoyed my pet name? 

TT: I’ll have to use them more often.

GA: Perhaps You Should

GA: ... 

GA: Babe

TT: Haha!

TT: Sorry, sorry, I’m not trying to ruin your moment.

GA: Do Not Worry It Was A Terrible Moment Already

GA: I Am Not Sure Why That Word Is Customary For Human Matesprits

GA: I Certainly Would Not Like To Be Called Wiggler

TT: Damn.

TT: There go my plans for my next flirtatious endeavor. 

GA: This Has Been Reassuring 

TT: It has?

GA: Yes

GA: Sometimes I Get So Caught Up In My Own Head That I Forget That At The End Of The Night You Really Are Not Her

GA: That Regardless Of Similarities To Her You Are Your Own Person

GA: And This Relationship Will Always Be Different Because It Is Me And You And Not Me And Her

GA: I Apologize If I Was Snippy With You

GA: The Meteor Has Given Me More Time Alone With My Thoughts Than I Am Used To

TT: Don’t apologize, you clearly needed to talk about it. 

TT: We don’t have to be done talking about it yet, either, if there’s more you want to say. I feel like we only scratched the surface of things.

TT: But clearly I don’t want to come off as too nosy either. I want to know only if talking will help you, not to satisfy my own personal curiosity. 

GA: I Appreciate That 

GA: But I Am Not Sure What Else To Say

GA: It Sounded Like We Were Having A Good Time Why Would I Want To Ruin It Again

TT: Oh Kanaya, no.

TT: You aren’t ruining anything by talking about your feelings, even if they aren’t positive ones. 

TT: Like I said earlier, I would much rather talk this out then let it get worse and worse in your head. 

GA: I Appreciate Your Efforts 

GA: Though It Is A Bit Hard To Believe You When You Use The Same Excuses That I Do When You Avoid Opening Up

GA: You Cannot Claim That It Is A Good Thing When You Refuse To Do It Yourself 

TT: ... 

TT: You’re right.

GA: Am I

TT: My first reaction was to get defensive; I had to stop and take a deep breath to avoid snapping at you.

TT: Which only further underscores my own hypocrisy.

TT: You deserve better from me than what I give you.

TT: Ah, but here I go making this into something you have to reassure me about, instead of the other way around.

TT: I’m going to work on opening up to you better, even if it’s difficult and especially in light of some of the things you’ve told me.

GA: Thank You

GA: I Truly Do Appreciate That 

GA: We Will Have To Discuss Quadrants And Our Place Within Them At A Later Date

GA: But I Would Always Like To Know More About You

GA: Both The Good And The Bad Things

GA: I Suppose I Have Already Embarrassed Myself Enough That I Lose Nothing In Saying That I Find You Incredibly Interesting 

TT: Coming from an alien space vampire, that is a high compliment. :)

TT: Or, more aptly, “Space” vampire.

GA: Haha

GA: I Do Not Think I Am Any More Or Less Interesting Than Anyone Else But I Will Try To Accept Your Compliment

TT: That’s all I can ask.

TT: And I still have over a sweep left of this journey to get you well-accustomed to accepting compliments.

GA: Oh My

GA: It Would Be A Shame If I Was Forced To Retaliate With Compliments Of My Own

TT: A shame indeed. 

TT: I’m happy to continue our blatant flirting, but I did want to check and make sure you really were done talking about Vriska.

GA: Well Nothing Can Kill The Mood Quite Like She Can

TT: You mean you haven’t enjoyed her unexpected presence at half of our dates?

GA: Usually I Would Say That She Did That As Payback For Something

GA: But She Really Is Just Like That

TT: Serious case of FOMO?

GA: ?

TT: “Fear of missing out.”

GA: Ha

GA: I Suppose So

GA: Despite All Of Her Blustering Otherwise She Really Does Just Like To Be Included 

TT: In many ways she reminds me quite a bit of a highly-spirited meowbeast.

TT: Wanting affection and attention, but only in the specific contexts that she demands it. 

GA: Haha

GA: Careful Now

GA: That Is A Trait That Both Of You Share As Well

TT: Hey, I take offense to that.

TT: I am at least slightly more even-tempered of a meowbeast, if anything. 

GA: You Really Are Not

GA: It Is Not A Bad Thing Though

GA: Not Most Of The Time

TT: How so?

GA: It Is No Issue To Want Time To Yourself Or To Not Want Physical Or Verbal Affection All Of The Time

GA: Everyone Needs Their Own Space

GA: It Is More When

GA: Hm

GA: Lets Say The Meowbeast Wants To Play With Something Dangerous 

GA: She Would Take Great Offense To Someone Trying To Stop Her

TT: Are you referring to the Green Sun?

GA: I Was Talking About Vriska

GA: But That Too I Suppose 

GA: Vriska Needed A Moirail And I Tried To Be That For Her

GA: But I Was Never Strong Enough To Truly Stop Her From Making Bad Decisions And Her And Our Other Friends Suffered For It 

TT: You aren’t responsible for what others choose to do. 

GA: Maybe

GA: But I Could Never Stop You Either

TT: In your defense, I was quite obstinately against being stopped. 

GA: Both Of You Were Lucky

TT: I suppose it is in our aspect. 

GA: You Acted So Much Like Her Then

GA: So Confident In Your Stupid Plan 

GA: If Your Quest Bed Had Not Been Waiting For You At The Green Sun 

GA: ... 

GA: Your Own Hubris Would Have Gotten You Killed 

GA: Permanently I Mean

TT: Lucky indeed, then. 

TT: I wanted to do quite a lot of things, but dying forever was not on the agenda. Not on purpose. 

TT: And it worked out quite well in the end, in my opinion, so I’d really rather not talk about it right now. 

GA: Surely You Have To Be Aware Of Your Own Blatant Hypocrisy Here

GA: Only Minutes After Calling It Out Yourself If I May Add

GA: Keep Whatever Biting Remark You Have To Yourself 

GA: I Promise You It Will Not Be Constructive 

TT: ... 

GA: Do You Want To Know Why Terezi Killed Vriska Before The Timeline Was Retconned

GA: Vriska Was Going To Go Find Jack Noir And Kill Him Herself

GA: She Had Complete Confidence That She Could Do It All Alone 

GA: Even Though He Had Just Effortlessly Slaughtered All Of Our Dream Selves

GA: And Even Eridan Who Loved To Pick Fights With Strong Opponents Felt There Was No Hope In Trying To Beat Him

GA: I Guess She Thought Being A God Tier Made Her Invincible

GA: Even Though She Only Ascended In The First Place Because Aradia Beat The Shit Out Of Her And Tavros Carried Her To Her Quest Bed While She Was Bleeding Out

GA: I Am Not Sure What I Did About It In The Original Timeline If Anything

GA: But In This One I Punched Her In The Face

GA: It Wasnt Even Enough To Stop Her Your Friend Had To Come Punch Her Again 

TT: I know none of that is supposed to be funny, but trying to picture it kind of is. 

GA: I Guess It Kind Of Was From An Outside Perspective

GA: I Mostly Just Remember Being Angrier Than I Had Ever Been Before

GA: Thinking Back On It Now Its Frustrating Too 

GA: The Only Time She Ever Looked At Me With Red Feelings Was Right After I Had Hit Her 

GA: And Since I Was So Angry Myself

GA: I Barely Even Noticed

GA: It Was One Of The Few Times I Didnt Care What She Thought About Me At All

TT: I’m really not trying to make light of this.

TT: The events that transpired right before I arrived on the meteor sound incredibly stressful. 

TT: We’re fortunate that the powers-that-be had enough use for us left to guarantee our survival as part of the alpha timeline. 

TT: Also selfishly, I’m glad that even with Vriska making heart eyes at you, that you still chose me regardless. 

GA: Trust Me I Was Not About To Leap Into Vriskas Arms After One Flushed Glance

GA: Thankfully I Am Not That Desperate 

TT: I did just realize something though.

GA: What

TT: You totally have a type. 

GA: Yes We Have Just Exhaustively Examined All The Ways In Which The Two People I Have Experienced Flushed Feeling For Are Similar 

TT: Light players.

GA: God Dammit 

TT: If you didn’t glow so much yourself, I would almost worry that you were an Icarus-type figure.

TT: Even if that analogy is a little grim.

GA: Who Is Icarus 

TT: He wasn’t a figure in your mythology? I assumed the combination of the deadly sun paired with the six-letter name would make him a perfect fit for Alternian mythos. 

GA: No I Have No Clue Who He Is 

GA: Also Most Adults Take On Titles That Are Not Six Letters

GA: It Is Not My Fault Our Hatchnaming System Was Efficient

TT: In Greek myths, Icarus was the son of Daedalus, a great inventor. The king imprisoned both of them on an island because Daedalus helped an enemy of his. 

TT: To escape, Daedalus fashioned wings out of wax and feathers so that he and his son could fly to freedom.

TT: Daedalus warned his son not to fly too close to the ocean or the sun as they escaped, as doing either could damage the wings.

TT: Icarus ignored his warning and flew high up in the sky.

TT: The sun melted his wings, and he fell into the ocean and drowned.

GA: And I Remind You Of Him

GA: I Am Not Sure I Want To Be Compared To This Winged Human Boy

TT: I don’t think hubris is a big issue on your part, no.

TT: I meant it in the more literal sense of the story.

TT: “Flying too close to the sun” was a common human expression.

TT: Not that I want our relationship to melt your metaphorical wings.

TT: Not at all.

TT: ...I’m not doing a very good job of this. 

GA: Haha

GA: Hahahahaha

TT: What is it?

GA: I Have Just Realized Something

GA: Im Not Sure If This Has Ever Come Up Before 

GA: But I Would Have Been Uniquely Suited To Survive In That Situation

GA: Well Not The Drowning Part I Guess 

GA: But I Was One Of The Few Members Of My Species Who Could Withstand The Alternian Sun

TT: Was that a rainbow drinker trait?

TT: I thought that you didn’t become one until shortly before Dave and I’s arrival on the meteor. 

GA: My Situation Was Unique In Many Different Ways So I Am Not Sure

GA: But I Was Always Able To Withstand The Sun Even As A Wiggler

GA: I Quite Enjoyed It In Fact 

GA: I Lived Out In The Desert Where It Was Always Very Bright And Warm

GA: Karkat Was Horrified When We Were Small And I Told Him I Was Going To Go Sunbathe

GA: But I Always Found It Nice 

TT: That does sound nice. 

TT: I grew up deep in the woods. There was sunlight, sure, but a lot of it was dimmed by the trees above. And in the winter it could get pretty gloomy. 

TT: My planet in the Game was incredibly bright, though.

GA: I Remember

GA: Mine Was As Well

TT: It was? Somehow, I don’t think I ever asked.

GA: The Land Of Rays And Frogs

GA: The Rays Were More Concentrated Than The Light On Your Planet But The Concept Remains

GA: My Planet Was Also Waterlogged Similarly To Yours But Lighting The Forge Fixed That 

TT: That sounds like a fun combination.

TT: Hell of an acronym, though. You definitely drew the short straw with LORAF. 

GA: The Name Sounding Like A Meowbeast Choking On A Hairball Aside

GA: The Light Was At Least Familiar 

GA: The Frogs Could Get A Little Loud Especially After Perigees Of Listening To Them

GA: Karkat Often Egged Them On As Well 

TT: Just for his sake, I’ll pretend to be shocked.

GA: I Am Sure Wherever He Is Right Now And Whatever He Is Up To

GA: His Bloodpusher Just Skipped A Little Beat In Appreciation 

TT: You know, I just realized something.

TT: With your resistance to the sun, your Land, your rainbow drinker glow...

TT: I think, aesthetically at least, you’re better suited to be a Light player than I ever was. 

TT: Maybe I’ve been the Icarus this whole time.

GA: Well I Promise I Will Do My Best Not To Melt Your Wax Wings

GA: But You Seem To Fly Quite Fine Without Wings So I Think Youll Be Alright 

GA: You Are Free To Fly As Close To Me As You Wish

TT: I think I may just have to take advantage of that. :)

TT: Speaking of, would you mind if I came over?

TT: I’d like to finish the novel Karkat lent us, if you wouldn’t mind reading some more. 

TT: I also think I may have managed to alchemize something close to the Earth delicacy of “Twizzlers.” But Dave refused to give them a test run, so it remains to be seen if they’re actually edible or not.

TT: I have high hopes that this will go better than the Milky Way disaster. 

GA: I Think That All Sounds Nice 

GA: And Thank You For Letting Me Ramble On About Well

GA: Everything 

TT: Sincerely, it was no problem at all.

TT: I hope that I was able to help you at least somewhat. 

GA: It Was Good To Talk About It

GA: Im Looking Forward To Seeing You

TT: And I, you.

TT: I’ll be careful not to let your innate sunlight burn me up completely.

TT: ;)

GA: Oh My A Winky Face

GA: How Very Forward Of You Miss Lalonde 

GA: ;)

TT: Haha!

TT: I’m on my way. 

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering grimAuxiliatrix [GA] \--

**Author's Note:**

> Man I love Kanaya and she's so much fun to write  
> All of this spawned because I *frequently* go down the mental rabbit hole of thinking about how deeply saturated her character is with Light imagery (don't even get me started on "like a moth to a flame" or her death in Game Over)  
> Anyway, thank you for reading!


End file.
